If your not going to win the argument, lie.
Why don't you just swallow all that makeup you put on? You might become pretty on the inside.
I will still love you when you're no longer young and beautiful.
In my dreams you're mine, in my life you're a dream.
Every woman is beautiful, it just takes the right man to see it.
Life is like a penis, when it gets hard, fuck it.
Life is like a penis. It's short, but seems so long when it gets hard
Everything will be alright in the end, if its not alright, its not the end.
Act like a gentleman, think like a boss.
The awkward moment when a guy has bigger boobs than you.
Chuck Norris made orange juice concentrate.
Life sucks. But what it sucks on we may never know.
Tip to reduce weight: Turn your head to the left then turn to the right. Repeat this exercise every time you are offered something to eat.
Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.
I put the laughter in manslaughter.
Until a man finds something to die for, he has nothing to live for.
Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
