Whatever floats your boat as long, as it doesn't sink mine.
I'm not addicted to Twitter. I only tweet when I have time: lunch time, break time, off time, this time, that time, any time, all the time.
The more pictures you post of your pet the more lonely you are. It's science.
Chuck Norris made orange juice concentrate.
History always has a way of repeating itself, bad or good, a perfect circle.
You can pay for school, but you can't buy class.
Behind every girls favorite song, is an untold story.
I really need you to, put the camera down and step away from the mirror.
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
I love that whenever we speak I have no idea what to say or how to feel.
Always remember to smile.
Hello substitute teacher... Goodbye assigned seats.
If you love something, let it go. If it doesn't come back to visit, hunt it down and kill it.
Cool story bro. You should get it in Oprah's book club.
Just like every president has a teleprompter, every idiot has a cameraman.
You are not a winner, just the last loser standing.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
Every woman is beautiful, it just takes the right man to see it.
Everyone and everything eventually becomes only just a memory.