Maturity is knowing when to be immature.
If you watch Cinderella backwards, it's about a woman who learns her place.
Dear 'K', You should get arrested for killing conversations.
To catch me, you gotta be fast. To find me, you gotta be smart. To be me? Sh*t! You gotta be kidding!
If a quiz is quizzical, what's a test?
I love that whenever we speak I have no idea what to say or how to feel.
A good friend buys you lunch. A true friend eats yours.
I always take life with a grain of salt, ...plus a slice of lemon, ...and a shot of tequila.
Chuck Norris once strangled someone with a cordless phone.
NO MUM. You're mad because you're wrong not because I was talking back.
If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea... does that mean that one enjoys it?
Here's a condom so that you can have protection while you go fuck yourself. :)
I went up to my moms face and screamed " I WANT FOOD !!! " Until I got slapped in the face
If you're lucky enough to be different, never change.
Believe in yourself. If you don't, then no one else will have a reason to.
The word 'studying' was made up of two words originally - 'students dying'.
The greatest part of being imperfect, is being perfect at it.
You are the result of 4 billion years of evolutionary success. Fucking act like it.
Cool story bro, tell it again and I'll punch you.