Boys will break your heart, Real men will pick up the pieces.
Patience gets you everywhere on time.
Chuck Norris has three types of laundry...whites, darks and blood stained.
Life is not measured by the amount of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
.sdrawkcab siht daer uoy edam I
I'm invisible, can you see me? Yeah? How about tomorrow night?
If you were my homework I'd do you on the table.
That moment when your mum shouts your name so you do a quick recap of all the things you've done recently to see if you're in trouble.
If you lost your virginity, Chuck Norris probably has it.
My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I wanted a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too.
We always start with completing the difficult. It just takes us a little longer to do the impossible.
Act like a gentleman, think like a boss.
I think therefore I am, we think therefore it is.
The word of the day is 'legs'. Let's go back to my place and spread the word.
I'm not a vegetarian because I love animals. I'm a vegetarian because I hate plants.
What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere?'Hold my purse.'
F that B.
Consciousness: that annoying time between naps.
