Boys will break your heart, Real men will pick up the pieces.
Don't tell me the rules if you can't even play the game.
The awkward moment when people are complaining about the sizes of their nose when Voldemort's in the room.
That moment when your mum shouts your name so you do a quick recap of all the things you've done recently to see if you're in trouble.
Finding the meaning to life gives life no meaning.
A girl looks at what a man drives. A woman looks at what drives a man.
Jingle bells, Twilight smells, Edward ran away, Bella died, Jacob cried, POTTER ALL THE WAY!!
I couldn't help but notice that awesome ends with 'me' and ugly starts with 'u'.
It's not how much you love someone that matters, it's how much you make them feel loved.
Mephobia. The fear of becoming so awesome that everyone dies.
I know they say the first love is the sweetest, but that first cut is the deepest.
Treat every problem as your dog would: If you can't eat it, fuck it or piss on it, then walk away.
When life blows sometimes the best thing you can be is a dick.
Procrastination is like masturbation....you're only screwing yourself.
Sex burns 25.7 calories per minute, with that being said, wanna work out?
Everybody is a student for life.
There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.
If at first you don't succeed..... CHEAT!
Cool story bro. Publish it and sell it to someone who gives a shit.
