Life is to SHORT, so kiss slowly, laugh insanely, love truly and forgive quickly.
I swear Mario is a hobo! he wakes up wearing the same clothes, runs in sewers, and steals coins. To buy what. MUSHROOMS?
Hello substitute teacher... Goodbye assigned seats.
A girl just told me she wants something with a lot of diamonds for her birthday, I'm gettin her a deck of cards!
If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining.
You should appreciate what you have, before it becomes what you had.
Light up the world with your smile, because you never know who might be stuck somewhere dark.
WORRY looks around. REGRET looks back. FAITH looks forward.
Why drink and drive when you can smoke and fly.
Who you are, who you want to be, and who you once were can be three different people.
It's not the goodbye that hurts, but the flashbacks that follow.
You don't like my opinion, wait until you hear the ones I keep to myself.
It's weird not to be weird.
A real man gives up one night stands for a woman he can't stand one night without.
Life is so much funnier when you have a dirty mind.
Taking forever to pick up a phone call because you're dancing to your ring tone.
If at first you don't succeed..... CHEAT!
Teacher: "You failed the test." - Student:"You failed to educate."
Kim Jong Il's last words. "Hey, you're Chuck Nor....."
