Everyday the sun rises, but it doesn't shine until you wake up.
When Chuck Norris had surgery, the anesthesia was applied to the doctors.
I am not afraid of death, it's just that I prefer not to be there when it happens.
Its much easier to apologize then it is to get permission.
Life isn't about staying dry, it's about learning how to play in the rain.
Don't let the fear of striking out, keep you from playing the game.
Don't waste electricity, would you like it if I turned you on and walked away?
Annoying moment: When you decide to be angry at someone for a week and the next morning, the anger you felt so strong, disappears.
I didn't say it was your fault; I said I was blaming you.
Knowledge is power, and power corrupts. So study hard and be evil.
I hate when you offer someone a sincere compliment on their mustache and suddenly she's not your friend anymore.
Cry over cuts and stitches not bastards and bitches.
Boys will break your heart, Real men will pick up the pieces.
Why don't you just swallow all that makeup you put on? You might become pretty on the inside.
An apple a day may keep the doctor away - but all these Macbooks are getting expensive.
Negativity is poison for the soul.
When I'm always in my room; parents complain. When I go out; parents complain.
Know one cares how much you know, unless they know how much you care.
Is that a mirror in your pocket? Cause I can see myself in your pants.
