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Everyday the sun rises, but it doesn't shine until you wake up.

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There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.

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We always start with completing the difficult. It just takes us a little longer to do the impossible.

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I'm not flirting, I'm just acting extra nice to someone who is extra attractive.

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I would love you if love meant the complete opposite of what it means today.

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I bet Osama Bin Laden regrets coming out of hiding to watch the Royal Wedding.

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Live everyday like it's your last because someday you will be right.

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Take it easy, give it hard.

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Haters make you famous.

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My biggest mistake is not kissing you when I had the chance.

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Facebook is for for friends who are now strangers, Twitter is for strangers who should be your friends.

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Be kind and courteous to everyone you meet but have a plan to kill them quickly if necessary.

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I'm not single. I'm in a long-standing relationship with fun and freedom.

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I love walking in the rain 'cause no one can see me crying.

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Compromising is the same as losing, it just sucks more because winning was never in the deal.

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You should appreciate what you have, before it becomes what you had.

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I tried to send you the most sexy thing on the planet, but the mail man told me to get out of the mailbox.

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Don't break anybody's heart, they have only one. Break their bones, they have 206.

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When your best friend comes to you with a bitch problem and you're like"I don't give a fuck."