Everyday the sun rises, but it doesn't shine until you wake up.
I'm not a vegetarian because I love animals. I'm a vegetarian because I hate plants.
When someone says they have to ask you a question, you think of all the bad things you've done recently.
Rappers always talk about robbing people in their songs, thats why I download all their songs for free. Payback!
Everyone has photographic memory; some just don't have the film.
Take it easy, give it hard.
Don't waste electricity, would you like it if I turned you on and walked away?
Never count on tomorrow because it may forget to show up.
Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go.
I'm not giving you an hour, or a second, or another minute longer. I'm busy getting stronger.
It's not the goodbye that hurts, but the flashbacks that follow.
Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband.
Learn to spell, kids. Auto Correct isn't always write.
I swear Mario is a hobo! he wakes up wearing the same clothes, runs in sewers, and steals coins. To buy what. MUSHROOMS?
When I watch MTV Cribs, the feeling of guilt from illegally downloading songs goes away.
I would kick your ass right now, but that would be animal abuse.
Some people should be high-fived...in the face.
I think 'First Response' and 'Plan B' should switch names.
Never lie to someone who trusts you. Never trust someone who lies to you.
