Everyday the sun rises, but it doesn't shine until you wake up.
If being sexy were against the law you'd be guilty as charged.
Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening' and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.
Don't trip over bitches, walk over them.
Every woman is beautiful, it just takes the right man to see it.
Why do Americans choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America?
Always remember to smile.
Tip to reduce weight: Turn your head to the left then turn to the right. Repeat this exercise every time you are offered something to eat.
Love me always, love me never, but don't love me sometimes.
Maybe you should eat some makeup so you can be pretty on the inside too, bitch.
Testing boys by not responding to their txts to see if they'll txt you again.
Playing comes first, you can work later.
Roses are red. Violets are blue! Faces like yours belong in the zoo. Don't be mad I'll be there too, not in the cage, but laughing at you.
Dear Boyfriend, Your wallet was getting fat so I thought I'd take it out for some exercise. Sincerely, your Girlfriend.
Don't tell me the rules if you can't even play the game.
You should never ruin an apology with an excuse.
Today I went on thesaurus.com and searched "ninjas". The computer told me "Ninjas cannot be found". Well played, ninjas, well played.
Today is the Tomorrow we worried about Yesterday.
Everyone has photographic memory; some just don't have the film.
