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That awkward moment when you walk through the metal detectors at the airport, and your abs of steel set them off.

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Winners do what other people won't.

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Laughing at the person because the joke was a fail.

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The smile is every woman's sexiest curve.

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He who laughs last thinks slowest.

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You can be worthless to someone, but priceless to another.

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I didn't say it was your fault; I said I was blaming you.

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I bet Osama Bin Laden regrets coming out of hiding to watch the Royal Wedding.

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Don't judge a book by its movie.

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Everybody spread positivity.

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Finding the meaning to life gives life no meaning.

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Don't make time for people who can't make time for you.

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Stubbing your toe and telling the inanimate object to f*ck off.

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So you're the bitch that told the bitch that I'm a bitch well listen bitch it takes a bitch to know a bitch, bitch.

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It's hard to answer "what's wrong", when nothing is right...

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Everything becomes funnier when you're not allowed to laugh.

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Some take the bait, others reel it in.

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God made opposites. He made heaven and hell, darkness and light. He made me smart, and you....

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Why drink and drive when you can smoke and fly.