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Mario: An Italian plumber that was created by Japanese people, who speaks English, but looks like a Mexican.

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I think therefore I am, we think therefore it is.

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If you watch Jaws backwards, its about a shark who throws up so many people, they have to open a beach.

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He broke her heart. She broke his X-Box. I think we all know who cried harder.

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Physiological fact: emotional pain lasts for twelve minutes, anything else is self inflicted.

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If Bill Gates had a penny for every time I had to reboot my computer...oh wait, he does.

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Life is not what you take of it, but what you make of it.

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When single you see happy couples. When in a relationship you see happy singles.

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That moment when your mum shouts your name so you do a quick recap of all the things you've done recently to see if you're in trouble.

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I say excuse me when I burp even when nobody is around....true gentleman.

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You cannot fathom the amount of fuck I do not give.

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The greatest part of being imperfect, is being perfect at it.

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You'll never know how strong you are, until being strong is the only choice you have.

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Don't tell me the sky is the limit when there are footsteps on the moon.

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"Dude that song is old"...."Well so is your mom....but you still listen to her."

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Don't waste electricity, would you like it if I turned you on and walked away?

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Never frown, because you never know who's falling in love with your smile.

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May the bridges I burn today, light the path tomorrow.

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You should never ruin an apology with an excuse.