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The awkward moment when Edward and Santa bump into each other in your room because they're both watching you sleep.

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You can spend your life avoiding your dreams, but everynight you go to sleep.

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F that B.

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Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.

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I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.

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Cool story bro. In what chapter do you shut the fuck up in?

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Know one cares how much you know, unless they know how much you care.

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The notion that you feel my pain is extremely uncertain. You have to apply the experience and pain of my life in order to come to this road.

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When your best friend comes to you with a bitch problem and you're like"I don't give a fuck."

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Take it easy, give it hard.

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I would love you if love meant the complete opposite of what it means today.

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This duct tape makes everything you say sound like "yes".

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If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of bill payments.

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"**** ***** is now friends with ****** ****** and 64 other people" damn....what a Facebook whore.

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Gravity is not the reason why people fall in love.

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Forget it enough to get over it, remember it enough so it doesnt happen again.

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The more pictures you post of your pet the more lonely you are. It's science.

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I have finally decided to give a crap. Now who wants the first piece?

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You never realize how offensive your music is until your parents are sitting in the passenger seat.