Take chances, make mistakes, and don't regret a second of life.
If karma doesn't knock you out soon, I will.
My ideal mate is someone like you, but with a different personality and with a different face.
Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.
Love is just a word, until someone comes along and gives it meaning.
Real eyes realize real lies.
Some people hear voices. Some see invisible people. Others have no imagination whatsoever.
Annoying moment: When you decide to be angry at someone for a week and the next morning, the anger you felt so strong, disappears.
I knew I was in love when all those stupid love songs started to make sense.
I don't know what's worse. Guys who refer to girls as b*tches, or the girls who actually respond to it.
A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" Father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."
You don't need some one to complete you, you just need someone to accept you completely...
I'm not stupid, I'm just not thinking straight right now.
I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked me in the cellar.
What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere?'Hold my purse.'
It is true that there is no "I" in team. But there is an "I" in win.
How much coke did Charlie Sheen take? Enough to kill Two and a Half Men.
So my life has reached the point where I've stopped asking "Why me!?" and started asking "Oh, again?"
Everyone and everything eventually becomes only just a memory.
