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Take chances, make mistakes, and don't regret a second of life.

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If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

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If being sexy were against the law you'd be guilty as charged.

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Haters make you famous.

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"Dude that song is old"...."Well so is your mom....but you still listen to her."

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Aspire to inspire before you expire.

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May the bridges I burn today, light the path tomorrow.

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You inspire me to be a better pervert.

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Giving up does not always mean you're weak, sometimes it just means your strong enough to let go.

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I study for minutes and take breaks for hours.

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If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.

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Chuck Norris made orange juice concentrate.

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I wish I was as much of a morning person as my penis is.

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Regret lasts longer than fear.

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Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

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Cool story bro. Wanna hear mine? It's a fairy tale; once upon a time, I don't give a shit. The end.

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Women want one man to fulfill their every need. Men want every woman to fulfill their one need.

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Shit happens bro. Now get over it.

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I'm invisible, can you see me? Yeah? How about tomorrow night?