Take chances, make mistakes, and don't regret a second of life.
It sucks that you can't photoshop that personality too, bitch.
Here's a condom so that you can have protection while you go fuck yourself. :)
There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.
If you're lucky enough to be different, never change.
Those who live by the sword are bound to be shot by those who don't.
The awkward moment when people are complaining about the sizes of their nose when Voldemort's in the room.
A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station..
The notion that you feel my pain is extremely uncertain. You have to apply the experience and pain of my life in order to come to this road.
You inspire me to be a better pervert.
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Except marriage, marriage will kill you.
My ideal mate is someone like you, but with a different personality and with a different face.
You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.
The sacrifice of hiding in the light is living with your shadows.
"Dude that song is old"...."Well so is your mom....but you still listen to her."
Everyone has photographic memory; some just don't have the film.
Life isn't about staying dry, it's about learning how to play in the rain.
Ladies, the only time it is okay to be skeleton skinny is when you are dead. So eat the frigging cookie and enjoy it.
So my life has reached the point where I've stopped asking "Why me!?" and started asking "Oh, again?"
