You never know how precious it is until you lose it. And you never know how annoying it is until you have it.
If you got haters, you must be doing something right.
There's no such thing as good girls gone bad, only bad girls found out.
Cool story bro. In what chapter do you shut the fuck up in?
When we hit our lowest point, We are open to the greatest changes.
Who you are, who you want to be, and who you once were can be three different people.
Life is like a penis. It's short, but seems so long when it gets hard
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
Life is a case of spoon or be spooned.
I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.
Auto-correct can kiss my ask.
What's the most successful pickup line ever? A: 'Does this smell like chloroform?'
I knew I was in love when all those stupid love songs started to make sense.
Everyday the sun rises, but it doesn't shine until you wake up.
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory
When your mum decides to be in the room while you're on the computer so you just switch to Google and just stare at it.
If you can't convince them, confuse them.
Every day you will meet a moron; if you haven't met one today, tomorrow you'll meet two.
I love that whenever we speak I have no idea what to say or how to feel.
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