You never know how precious it is until you lose it. And you never know how annoying it is until you have it.
Boobs. That's all, just like this if you like boobs.
A real man gives up one night stands for a woman he can't stand one night without.
The awkward moment when people are complaining about the sizes of their nose when Voldemort's in the room.
A rumor goes in one ear, then out of many mouths.
Winners don't wait for chances, they grab them.
Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.
The more pictures you post of your pet the more lonely you are. It's science.
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
Take my advice, don't listen to my advice.
I don't have an attitude, I have a personality you can't handle.
A man can sweep any woman off her feet, he just needs the right broom.
Tip to reduce weight: Turn your head to the left then turn to the right. Repeat this exercise every time you are offered something to eat.
When someone says they have to ask you a question, you think of all the bad things you've done recently.
Life is like a penis, when it gets hard, fuck it.
You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.
If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong.
2013: The year when the movie 2012 will be moved from the action section, to comedy section.
Life sucks. But what it sucks on we may never know.
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