You don't have to understand to be understanding.
My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I wanted a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too.
Some take the bait, others reel it in.
We are bestfriends. Always remember that when you fall, I'll pick you up. After I finish laughing.
Why drink and drive when you can smoke and fly.
I don't have an attitude, I have a personality you can't handle.
I know the beginning and end of this book but what shapes life are the chapters between.
You know it's going to be a great story when its starts off with, "So this b*tch!..."
Fairy tales are more than true; not because they tell us that dragons exist, but because they tell us that dragons can be beaten.
If you find yourself using the expression "haters gonna hate" a lot, there's a better than average chance you're a douchebag.
Life's disappointments are harder to take when you don't know any swear words.
If your life is so shitty maybe you should wipe your ass better.
The awkward moment when wikipedia has copied your homework.
Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 52 people. Then the grenade exploded.
You don't need some one to complete you, you just need someone to accept you completely...
If you can't be a good example then at least be a horrible warning.
You never know how precious it is until you lose it. And you never know how annoying it is until you have it.
When I watch MTV Cribs, the feeling of guilt from illegally downloading songs goes away.
KEEP YOUR HEAD HIGH, and you're middle finger HIGHER.