Today I went on thesaurus.com and searched "ninjas". The computer told me "Ninjas cannot be found". Well played, ninjas, well played.
If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.
The awkward moment when you politely decline food at a friends house and immediately regret the decision afterwards.
Two things I hate the most: (1) The new lover of an EX (2) The EX of a new lover.
Men are like bank accounts. Without a lot of money they don't generate a lot of interest.
If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.
A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" Father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."
I miss you like an idiot misses the point.
Everybody is a student for life.
Once upon a time, there was a boy and girl who loved each other. Then a slut came and ruined everything. The end.
If you want to look young and thin, hang out around fat old people.
Dear Bull, What did I do to deserve so much shit?
If you can't be a good example then at least be a horrible warning.
The world needs less people that judge and more people that love.
I want a person who comes into my life by accident, but stays on purpose.
How the hell does Freddy Kruger wipe his ass?
Practice makes perfect, but nobody's perfect, so why practice?
Wild hearts can't be broken.
The awkward moment when Edward and Santa bump into each other in your room because they're both watching you sleep.
