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Fairy tales are more than true; not because they tell us that dragons exist, but because they tell us that dragons can be beaten.

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Those awkward karate chops you give door just incase it shocks you.

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WORRY looks around. REGRET looks back. FAITH looks forward.

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The awkward moment when you realize that people are really laughing at you, not with you.

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You're only as good as your last game.

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Maturity is knowing when to be immature.

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Cool story bro. Put it in the history books with all the other boring sh*t I don't care about.

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Know one cares how much you know, unless they know how much you care.

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War does not determine who is right - only who is left.

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Chuck Norris once strangled someone with a cordless phone.

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Don't hate me because I'm better than you, hate yourself because you're not as good as me.

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Would you like a table? ... "No, I came to the restaurant to eat on the ground, a carpet for 5 please." -_-

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What you call dog with no legs? Don't matter what you call him, he ain't gonna come.

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I'm your favorite hello and your hardest goodbye.

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Thanks wind, you totally raped my hair.

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Learn to spell, kids. Auto Correct isn't always write.

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I have a lot of time on my hands when I'm wearing two watches.

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Yeah, I'm single, but you're gonna have to be amazing to change that.

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Some women can't find a GOOD MAN cause they're too busy looking for a PERFECT MAN.