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Born to be different, like everyone else.

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Cool story bro. Put it in the history books with all the other boring sh*t I don't care about.

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My foot just fell asleep. I think I'm gonna kick it with your face to wake it up.

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May the bridges I burn today, light the path tomorrow.

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Your a boy, I'm a girl. So tell me again why we aren't dating?

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War does not determine who is right - only who is left.

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Chuck Norris has three types of laundry...whites, darks and blood stained.

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Right things happen at the wrong time if you wait for them to happen.

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Two things I hate the most: (1) The new lover of an EX (2) The EX of a new lover.

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Why drink and drive when you can smoke and fly.

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Don't let the fear of striking out, keep you from playing the game.

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You can pay for school, but you can't buy class.

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If there was only woman ruling the word there would be no wars. Just a bunch of countries jealous of each other.

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Cool story bro. You should get it in Oprah's book club.

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You never realize how offensive your music is until your parents are sitting in the passenger seat.

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Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.

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I love walking in the rain 'cause no one can see me crying.

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If you ever get caught sleeping on the job... slowly raise your head and say, 'In Jesus name, amen'

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The awkward moment when you politely decline food at a friends house and immediately regret the decision afterwards.