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I'm invisible, can you see me? Yeah? How about tomorrow night?

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Life is to SHORT, so kiss slowly, laugh insanely, love truly and forgive quickly.

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The world is a fucked up place. You fit right in.

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We always start with completing the difficult. It just takes us a little longer to do the impossible.

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I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

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Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.

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Treat every problem as your dog would: If you can't eat it, fuck it or piss on it, then walk away.

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Immaturity keeps me young.

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Maybe you should eat some makeup so you can be pretty on the inside too, bitch.

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Today is the Tomorrow we worried about Yesterday.

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My grandma is 80 and she still doesn't need glasses... she drinks straight out of the bottle.

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Say what you mean and mean what you say because the people that matter don't mind and the people that mind don't matter.

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Some people just need a high-five. To the face. With a chair.

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Sitting in the cinema, ready to watch the movie, then BOOM! The human giraffe sits in front of you.

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The minute you settle for less than what you deserve you get less than what you settled for.

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You should never ruin an apology with an excuse.

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Take my advice, don't listen to my advice.

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A girl just told me she wants something with a lot of diamonds for her birthday, I'm gettin her a deck of cards!

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I went up to my moms face and screamed " I WANT FOOD !!! " Until I got slapped in the face