Each morning when we wake up, we have two choices: go back to sleep and keep dreaming, or wake up and chase those dreams.
You can pay for school, but you can't buy class.
A man can sweep any woman off her feet, he just needs the right broom.
Life is a bitch, but totally do-able.
Gravity is not the reason why people fall in love.
I don't hate school. I just hate the teachers, the homework, the exams and waking up early in the morning.
From a girl's point of view, the guy always chooses the slut. From a boy's point of view, the girl always chooses the jerk.
No one said it would be easy but I'm saying it's going to be worth it.
My grandma is 80 and she still doesn't need glasses... she drinks straight out of the bottle.
The word of the day is 'legs'. Let's go back to my place and spread the word.
I have moments of brilliance and hours of stupidity.
A good friend buys you lunch. A true friend eats yours.
Don't break anybody's heart, they have only one. Break their bones, they have 206.
Today was a beautiful day. Then you showed up.
Teacher: "DO YOU WANT TO SPEND LUNCH IN MY CLASS?!" Me: Are you asking me out? O_O
I'm not flirting, I'm just acting extra nice to someone who is extra attractive.
Cool story bro. Yeah your mums in the next chapter.
Act like a gentleman, think like a boss.
Everyone's fine with babies being entertained by keys, but let one baby drive a Porsche and suddenly I'm a horrible uncle.
