What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere?'Hold my purse.'
The smile is every woman's sexiest curve.
"Dude that song is old"...."Well so is your mom....but you still listen to her."
Talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand.
Teacher: "DO YOU WANT TO SPEND LUNCH IN MY CLASS?!" Me: Are you asking me out? O_O
When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself.
Smart girls open their mind, easy girls open their legs, and foolish girls open their heart.
Why is a school zone 20mph? That seems like the optimal cruising speed for pedophiles...
I'm not stupid, I'm just not thinking straight right now.
Playing comes first, you can work later.
Ohh, that sounds kinda harsh. I better add a 'lol'.
The word 'studying' was made up of two words originally - 'students dying'.
War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
I love using big words to sound smart. I mean utilizing gargantuan idioms to fabricate intelligence.
Jesus can walk on water but Chuck Norris can walk on Jesus.
It is true that there is no "I" in team. But there is an "I" in win.
Don't fall in love, fall off a bridge, trust me, it hurts less.
The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.
Fairy tales are more than true; not because they tell us that dragons exist, but because they tell us that dragons can be beaten.
