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Dear Boyfriend, Your wallet was getting fat so I thought I'd take it out for some exercise. Sincerely, your Girlfriend.

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It is true that there is no "I" in team. But there is an "I" in win.

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There are needs and there are wants. I need what I want.

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I'm not giving you an hour, or a second, or another minute longer. I'm busy getting stronger.

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If you're good at something, don't do it for free.

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Don't waste electricity, would you like it if I turned you on and walked away?

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Be man enough to accept the consequences, be child enough to do it anyway.

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It's better to be the owner of your silence than the slave of your words.

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Life's not a bitch, you're the bitch because your not trying hard enough.

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Forget it enough to get over it, remember it enough so it doesnt happen again.

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Don't break anybody's heart, they have only one. Break their bones, they have 206.

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I wish I was as much of a morning person as my penis is.

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Learn to spell, kids. Auto Correct isn't always write.

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2011: Cool story, bro. 1836: Interesting tale, my fine companion.

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Don't judge a book by its movie.

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Everyone is gifted, but some people never open their package.

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Chuck Norris made orange juice concentrate.

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I eat problems, then shit out success.

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When I'm always in my room; parents complain. When I go out; parents complain.