If we were on a sinking ship together and there was only one life jacket...I'd miss u heaps and think of you often.
I think therefore I am, we think therefore it is.
Time is never wasted when you're wasted all the time.
I tried to send you the most sexy thing on the planet, but the mail man told me to get out of the mailbox.
If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.
S_CCESS can't be complete without U.
I hate when you offer someone a sincere compliment on their mustache and suddenly she's not your friend anymore.
I'm not lazy, I'm just highly motivated not to do anything.
Cool story bro, tell it again and I'll punch you.
Boobs. That's all, just like this if you like boobs.
Sex burns 25.7 calories per minute, with that being said, wanna work out?
It sucks that you can't photoshop that personality too, bitch.
Procrastination is like masturbation....you're only screwing yourself.
