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If we were on a sinking ship together and there was only one life jacket...I'd miss u heaps and think of you often.

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Pickles are just cucumbers soaked in evil.

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I am not afraid of death, it's just that I prefer not to be there when it happens.

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If there was only woman ruling the word there would be no wars. Just a bunch of countries jealous of each other.

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Don't fall in love, fall off a bridge, trust me, it hurts less.

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I'm not giving you an hour, or a second, or another minute longer. I'm busy getting stronger.

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The sacrifice of hiding in the light is living with your shadows.

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The awkward moment when someone is yelling at you and you're desperately trying not to laugh at their angry face.

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Chuck Norris will never die of a heart attack because his heart isn't that foolish to attack him.

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It's hard to talk face to face, when your head is up your ass.

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Relationship status: Thank god there are 2 TVs in this house.

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"**** ***** is now friends with ****** ****** and 64 other people" damn....what a Facebook whore.

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I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places

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Don't tell me the rules if you can't even play the game.

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Testing boys by not responding to their txts to see if they'll txt you again.

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I knew I was in love when all those stupid love songs started to make sense.

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I'm a very nice person...but for you I'll make an exception.

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Don't waste electricity, would you like it if I turned you on and walked away?

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Don't punish the man in front of you for the mistakes made by the man behind you.