Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.
Those who criticize our generation forget who raised it.
Every woman is beautiful, it just takes the right man to see it.
I'm not stupid, I'm just not thinking straight right now.
I don't have an attitude problem. You have a problem with my attitude, and that's not my problem.
Chuck Norris puts the "fun" in "Funeral".
Don't judge a book by its movie.
If at first you don't succeed..... CHEAT!
Hurting someone with the truth is better than killing them with a lie.
Those who like me, raise your hand. Those who don't, raise your standards.
The awkward moment when you're eavesdropping on a strangers conversation and accidentally laugh out loud at a funny part.
There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.
You're never too old to learn something stupid.
When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself.
I'm sorry you had bad luck and turned out to be an idiot.
If you can't beat them, taze them.
The awkward moment when you're on a bouncy castle and you fall down and the other bitches on there wont stop jumping so u can't get back up.
Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 52 people. Then the grenade exploded.
The awkward moment when you politely decline food at a friends house and immediately regret the decision afterwards.
