My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I wanted a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too.
I don't believe in miracles. I rely on them.
Teacher: "DO YOU WANT TO SPEND LUNCH IN MY CLASS?!" Me: Are you asking me out? O_O
2011: Cool story, bro. 1836: Interesting tale, my fine companion.
In my dreams you're mine, in my life you're a dream.
The awkward moment when a guy has bigger boobs than you.
The last thing I want to do is die.
Research shows that 90% of men don't know how to use condom, these people are called DADS.
They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
Regret lasts longer than fear.
Say what you mean and mean what you say because the people that matter don't mind and the people that mind don't matter.
Never frown, because you never know who's falling in love with your smile.
Playing comes first, you can work later.
Don't let the world change your smile, let your smile change the world.
I would love you if love meant the complete opposite of what it means today.
Wild hearts can't be broken.
Sex burns 25.7 calories per minute, with that being said, wanna work out?
Born to be different, like everyone else.
If you were my homework I'd do you on the table.
