Homework: Do me do me. Internet: Don't listen to that slut.
Know one cares how much you know, unless they know how much you care.
Life is a bitch, but totally do-able.
If you can't convince them, confuse them.
The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
Some women can't find a GOOD MAN cause they're too busy looking for a PERFECT MAN.
Laughing is when a smile has an orgasm.
Don't wait for the perfect moment, take the moment and make it perfect.
Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.
Life is like a penis, when it gets hard, fuck it.
Make money, don't let it make you.
The greatest part of being imperfect, is being perfect at it.
Laughter is a better way to bring tears to the eyes.
If all MEN are the same, why do WOMEN take so long to choose one?
Most people are still alive because its illegal to shoot them.
I'm a very nice person...but for you I'll make an exception.
Your actions are speaking so loudly, I cannot hear what you are saying.
Single doesn't always mean lonely and Relationship doesn't always mean happy.
When all fails, kamikaze and take everyone with you.
