Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.
Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
Winners do what other people won't.
A rumor goes in one ear, then out of many mouths.
Ironically, Chuck Norris' hidden talent is invisibility.
If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.
If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit.
Charlie Sheen just set record for 'fastest time to reach a million Twitter followers.' Not his only speed record.
When all fails, kamikaze and take everyone with you.
When a teacher sends you outside you have successfully won the argument.
Women may not hit harder, but they hit lower.
It's better to be the owner of your silence than the slave of your words.
Everyone and everything eventually becomes only just a memory.
Love always costs more than you can afford, but its always worth the price.
Coughing in front of smokers to make them feel guilty.
Everyone thinks that: Its every girl's dream to find the perfect guy....in fact its every girl's dream to eat without getting fat.
I don't have an attitude problem. You have a problem with my attitude, and that's not my problem.
Roses are red. Violets are blue! Faces like yours belong in the zoo. Don't be mad I'll be there too, not in the cage, but laughing at you.
Unless your name is Google, stop acting like you know everything.