When Chuck Norris had surgery, the anesthesia was applied to the doctors.
Research shows that 90% of men don't know how to use condom, these people are called DADS.
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Except marriage, marriage will kill you.
I'm sorry you had bad luck and turned out to be an idiot.
I say excuse me when I burp even when nobody is around....true gentleman.
Life isn't about staying dry, it's about learning how to play in the rain.
Always remember to smile.
I love walking in the rain 'cause no one can see me crying.
Truth can stand on its own, only lies require faith.
I'm not an Alcoholic. Alcoholics need a drink, I already have one.
If we're not supposed to have late night snacks....why is there a light in the fridge?
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
Don't judge a book by its movie.
Annoying moment: When you decide to be angry at someone for a week and the next morning, the anger you felt so strong, disappears.
Everyone is gifted, but some people never open their package.
Sadly some boys think of girls as books; If the cover doesn't catch their eye they don't bother to read whats inside.
Life's disappointments are harder to take when you don't know any swear words.
Make money, don't let it make you.
Dear Bull, What did I do to deserve so much shit?
