There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.
When life blows sometimes the best thing you can be is a dick.
If being sexy were against the law you'd be guilty as charged.
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
I don't make the same mistake twice....I make it 5 or 6 times just to make sure.
Life is to SHORT, so kiss slowly, laugh insanely, love truly and forgive quickly.
The greatest part of being imperfect, is being perfect at it.
24 hours in a day 24 beers in a case coincidence? I think not.
Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.
Born to be different, like everyone else.
What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere?'Hold my purse.'
I didn't fall, I just caught the floor.
Kim Jong Il's last words. "Hey, you're Chuck Nor....."
I don't hate school. I just hate the teachers, the homework, the exams and waking up early in the morning.
If your not going to win the argument, lie.
Wild hearts can't be broken.
11.24265336624% of people pay too much attention to details.
Cool story bro. Put it in the history books with all the other boring sh*t I don't care about.
We never really grow up; we only learn how to act in public.
