There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.
Don't wait for anybody to complete you.
You can be worthless to someone, but priceless to another.
Today was a beautiful day. Then you showed up.
It isn't till you've lost everything that you are free to do anything.
Winners do what other people won't.
I know they say the first love is the sweetest, but that first cut is the deepest.
Cool story bro, tell it again and I'll punch you.
Have you ever noticed that when you walk into a spider web you suddenly become a ninja?
Some people hear voices. Some see invisible people. Others have no imagination whatsoever.
If most people said what was on their minds, they'd be speechless.
I'm gonna go take a hot shower. It's like a normal shower, but with me in it.
There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
You can pay for school, but you can't buy class.
They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
Jesus can walk on water but Chuck Norris can walk on Jesus.
I hate when I walk into a room, forget what I need, walk out and then remember.
Knowledge is power, and power corrupts. So study hard and be evil.
Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt.
