If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea... does that mean that one enjoys it?
War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
Women don't want to hear what you think, women want to hear what they think, in a deeper voice.
Pickles are just cucumbers soaked in evil.
I think therefore I am, we think therefore it is.
Some people just need a high-five. To the face. With a chair.
If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit.
Women may not hit harder, but they hit lower.
The awkward moment when teacher cracks a joke and no one laughs.
People are stupid, with random moments of brilliance.
When all fails, kamikaze and take everyone with you.
The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list.
Life is to SHORT, so kiss slowly, laugh insanely, love truly and forgive quickly.
The human heart is like a spring, to bounce back from pitfalls and rise to joys, and it definitely needs space.
I'm your favorite hello and your hardest goodbye.
He who laughs last didn't get it.
Each morning when we wake up, we have two choices: go back to sleep and keep dreaming, or wake up and chase those dreams.
Don't tell me the rules if you can't even play the game.
Believe in yourself. If you don't, then no one else will have a reason to.
