If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea... does that mean that one enjoys it?
Every sinner has a future, every saint has a past.
This duct tape makes everything you say sound like "yes".
To whom much is expected, much should be suspected.
The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
Laughing is when a smile has an orgasm.
Facebook is for for friends who are now strangers, Twitter is for strangers who should be your friends.
The more pictures you post of your pet the more lonely you are. It's science.
A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station..
Everyone and everything eventually becomes only just a memory.
Life is not what you take of it, but what you make of it.
Teacher: Why can I hear talking? Student: Because you have ears.
We are bestfriends. Always remember that when you fall, I'll pick you up. After I finish laughing.
Sleep, hugs, kisses, love, friends, family, memories, smiles, laughter, fun... the best things in life are free.
You live and you learn.
When your mum decides to be in the room while you're on the computer so you just switch to Google and just stare at it.
A girl looks at what a man drives. A woman looks at what drives a man.
An apple a day may keep the doctor away - but all these Macbooks are getting expensive.
Why drink and drive when you can smoke and fly.
