The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
No one said it would be easy but I'm saying it's going to be worth it.
A soulmate is meeting the piece of you that is missing. It's undeniable and scary, but you feel lost without it.
Everyone's fine with babies being entertained by keys, but let one baby drive a Porsche and suddenly I'm a horrible uncle.
You should never ruin an apology with an excuse.
The sacrifice of hiding in the light is living with your shadows.
Be what you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.
If you want to look young and thin, hang out around fat old people.
Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.
Some women can't find a GOOD MAN cause they're too busy looking for a PERFECT MAN.
If she talks to you about everyone then she must talk to everyone about you.
Why drink and drive when you can smoke and fly.
Everybody thinks that a girl's dream is to find the perfect guy. Yeah right, our dream is to EAT WITHOUT GETTING FAT!
Good things don't always have to come to an end.
Laughing is when a smile has an orgasm.
You're only as good as your last game.
Karma's a bitch when you're a bitch.
Finding the meaning to life gives life no meaning.
Love needs to get glasses.
