The toughest thing about success is that you've got to keep on being a success.
I didn't fall, I just caught the floor.
Married men live longer than single men, but they're a lot more willing to die.
I have finally decided to give a crap. Now who wants the first piece?
Don't wait for anybody to complete you.
Gravity is not the reason why people fall in love.
When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself.
When I'm bored, I eat. When I'm happy, I eat. When I'm sad, I eat.
I have no time for stupid people. But they sure do have time for me.
Life is a bitch, but totally do-able.
Have you ever noticed that when you walk into a spider web you suddenly become a ninja?
I know they say the first love is the sweetest, but that first cut is the deepest.
Thanks wind, you totally raped my hair.
Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.
The awkward moment when you're eavesdropping on a strangers conversation and accidentally laugh out loud at a funny part.
Life is to SHORT, so kiss slowly, laugh insanely, love truly and forgive quickly.
Talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand.
Be man enough to accept the consequences, be child enough to do it anyway.
There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.
