Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening' and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.
How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?
I'm not an alcoholic, I only drink two times a year. On my birthday, and when its not my birthday.
I love using big words to sound smart. I mean utilizing gargantuan idioms to fabricate intelligence.