Surprise sex is the best thing to wake up to, unless you're in prison.
The awkward moment when someones yelling at you and your desperately trying not to laugh at their angry face.
I hate people who are lazy. They're so lazy, they don't even finish their own
Don't fall in love, fall off a bridge, trust me, it hurts less.
I have moments of brilliance and hours of stupidity.
I think 'First Response' and 'Plan B' should switch names.
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
Don't let the world change your smile, let your smile change the world.
When life blows sometimes the best thing you can be is a dick.
Be man enough to accept the consequences, be child enough to do it anyway.
Boyfriends are like goal keepers. Just because they are there doesn't mean you can't score.
I think therefore I am, we think therefore it is.
Teacher: Why can I hear talking? Student: Because you have ears.
Dear Boyfriend, Your wallet was getting fat so I thought I'd take it out for some exercise. Sincerely, your Girlfriend.
Short answers silent treatment not smiling = You did something wrong.
The lottery: voluntary taxation.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
It is true that there is no "I" in team. But there is an "I" in win.
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
