Surprise sex is the best thing to wake up to, unless you're in prison.
You cannot fathom the amount of fuck I do not give.
You can pay for school, but you can't buy class.
Don't trip over bitches, walk over them.
Fight poverty. Throw stones at beggers.
In my dreams you're mine, in my life you're a dream.
You are not a winner, just the last loser standing.
If there was only woman ruling the word there would be no wars. Just a bunch of countries jealous of each other.
Don't break anybody's heart, they have only one. Break their bones, they have 206.
Believe in yourself. If you don't, then no one else will have a reason to.
Here's a condom so that you can have protection while you go fuck yourself. :)
Chuck Norris was bit by a poisonous snake. After 5 days of excruciating pain, the snake died.
I'm not an alcoholic, I only drink two times a year. On my birthday, and when its not my birthday.
I think therefore I am, we think therefore it is.
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
I'm not insulting you, I'm describing you.
Eventually people will realize that mistakes are meant for learning not repeating.
Life isn't about staying dry, it's about learning how to play in the rain.
You never realize how offensive your music is until your parents are sitting in the passenger seat.
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