Surprise sex is the best thing to wake up to, unless you're in prison.
I'm tired of girls complaining that theres no good guys left...hello..we are where you left us, IN THE FRIEND ZONE.
Admit it! At one point in your life you closed the fridge really slowly to see when the light turns off.
Problems cannot be solved by the same level of thinking that created them.
I didn't say it was your fault; I said I was blaming you.
Sometimes giving someone a second chance is like giving them a second bullet for their gun because they missed the first time.
F that B.
Science has made us gods even before we are worthy of being men.
Ironically, Chuck Norris' hidden talent is invisibility.
If you can't convince them, confuse them.
I'm not addicted to Twitter. I only tweet when I have time: lunch time, break time, off time, this time, that time, any time, all the time.
I'm not giving you an hour, or a second, or another minute longer. I'm busy getting stronger.
Sleep, hugs, kisses, love, friends, family, memories, smiles, laughter, fun... the best things in life are free.
A successful man is one that can make more than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
Those awkward karate chops you give door just incase it shocks you.
Haters make you famous.
Ohh, that sounds kinda harsh. I better add a 'lol'.
If you lost your virginity, Chuck Norris probably has it.
Wild hearts can't be broken.
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