You can pay for school, but you can't buy class.
I couldn't help but notice that awesome ends with 'me' and ugly starts with 'u'.
Lifes a bitch....so when life sucks just sit back and enjoy the head.
Each morning when we wake up, we have two choices: go back to sleep and keep dreaming, or wake up and chase those dreams.
If you were my homework I'd do you on the table.
The ultimate price you pay is nothing but time.
Patience gets you everywhere on time.
The awkward moment when someone is yelling at you and you're desperately trying not to laugh at their angry face.
When I watch MTV Cribs, the feeling of guilt from illegally downloading songs goes away.
A girl just told me she wants something with a lot of diamonds for her birthday, I'm gettin her a deck of cards!
Nice shoes! Wanna screw?
You don't like my opinion, wait until you hear the ones I keep to myself.
I always take life with a grain of salt, ...plus a slice of lemon, ...and a shot of tequila.
Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go.
We never really grow up; we only learn how to act in public.
I didn't lose my sanity. I sent it away for its own protection.
I didn't fall, I just caught the floor.
When Chuck Norris had surgery, the anesthesia was applied to the doctors.
If we're not supposed to have late night snacks....why is there a light in the fridge?
