If I'm weird with you, I'm comfortable with you.
Know one cares how much you know, unless they know how much you care.
A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip.
Be man enough to accept the consequences, be child enough to do it anyway.
Some people just need a high-five. To the face. With a chair.
The awkward moment when people are complaining about the sizes of their nose when Voldemort's in the room.
Cool story bro. Needs more dragons.
If your not going to win the argument, lie.
Cool story bro. In what chapter do you shut the fuck up in?
Cool story bro. Publish it and sell it to someone who gives a shit.
True friends aren't bought, they are earned.
I'll advise you... don't mess with me: I know Karate, Judo, Tai Kwon Do, Jujitsu and 28 other dangerous words.
If Bill Gates had a penny for every time I had to reboot my computer...oh wait, he does.
The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.
Just because your smart doesn't mean your wise.
Cry over cuts and stitches not bastards and bitches.
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory
A real man gives up one night stands for a woman he can't stand one night without.
