"**** ***** is now friends with ****** ****** and 64 other people" damn....what a Facebook whore.
If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.
The awkward moment when Edward and Santa bump into each other in your room because they're both watching you sleep.
It's weird not to be weird.
If they dont chase you when you walk away....keep walking.
Take chances, make mistakes, and don't regret a second of life.
Some women can't find a GOOD MAN cause they're too busy looking for a PERFECT MAN.
If a quiz is quizzical, what's a test?
It's hard to answer "what's wrong", when nothing is right...
Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.
I'm not getting drunk. I'm getting awesome.
Act like a gentleman, think like a boss.
Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
A relationship with NO TRUST is like a car with no gasoline. You can stay in it all you want but it won't go anywhere.
Never frown, because you never know who's falling in love with your smile.
Bought a CD of ice cream van music. Now I drive with the stereo on full blast, watching the disappointment on all the little kids faces.
Love needs to get glasses.
There are needs and there are wants. I need what I want.
Life isn't about staying dry, it's about learning how to play in the rain.
