KEEP YOUR HEAD HIGH, and you're middle finger HIGHER.
An apple a day may keep the doctor away - but all these Macbooks are getting expensive.
Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.
I put the laughter in manslaughter.
I love walking in the rain 'cause no one can see me crying.
The ultimate price you pay is nothing but time.
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
You know you're getting old when people start telling you how young you look.
I say excuse me when I burp even when nobody is around....true gentleman.
God must love stupid people. He made SO many.
Sometimes I look at people and think: That sperm actually won?
Playing comes first, you can work later.
Dreams lift when reality falls.
The world is a fucked up place. You fit right in.
A drunk man's words are a sober man's thoughts.
Gravity is not the reason why people fall in love.
Unless your name is Google, stop acting like you know everything.
Those awkward karate chops you give door just incase it shocks you.
If it put a smile on my face, there is no reason to regret.
