I'm thinking of a finger, and it's not 1, 2, 4, or 5.
My middle finger gets a boner when I think of you.
I don't believe in miracles. I rely on them.
F that B.
2011: Cool story, bro. 1836: Interesting tale, my fine companion.
Mephobia. The fear of becoming so awesome that everyone dies.
What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere?'Hold my purse.'
I hate people who are lazy. They're so lazy, they don't even finish their own
My biggest mistake is not kissing you when I had the chance.
Don't let the fear of striking out, keep you from playing the game.
Everything becomes funnier when you're not allowed to laugh.
If you love something, let it go. If it doesn't come back to visit, hunt it down and kill it.
I say excuse me when I burp even when nobody is around....true gentleman.
Don't like me? Take a seat with the rest of the bitches waiting for me to give a fuck
Life is so much funnier when you have a dirty mind.
Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go.
There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
Thanks wind, you totally raped my hair.
Don't allow someone to be your priorty while allowing yourself to be there option.
