Girls are like aspirin. I take two and go to bed.
You got enemies, good that means you stood up for something.
So you're the bitch that told the bitch that I'm a bitch well listen bitch it takes a bitch to know a bitch, bitch.
I'm so broke I can't even pay attention.
Chuck Norris was bit by a poisonous snake. After 5 days of excruciating pain, the snake died.
The word of the day is 'legs'. Let's go back to my place and spread the word.
If at first you don't succeed..... CHEAT!
I know the beginning and end of this book but what shapes life are the chapters between.
When we hit our lowest point, We are open to the greatest changes.
Good things don't always have to come to an end.
Most people are still alive because its illegal to shoot them.
A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" Father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."
If a quiz is quizzical, what's a test?
Ohh, that sounds kinda harsh. I better add a 'lol'.
If someone tries to bring you down it means that you are higher than them.
Never close a door that someone still holds a key to.
Jesus can walk on water but Chuck Norris can walk on Jesus.
2011: Cool story, bro. 1836: Interesting tale, my fine companion.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot.
