If you love something, let it go. If it doesn't come back to visit, hunt it down and kill it.
I'm not stupid, I'm just not thinking straight right now.
Chuck Norris made orange juice concentrate.
Talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand.
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Except marriage, marriage will kill you.
Maturity is knowing when to be immature.
WORRY looks around. REGRET looks back. FAITH looks forward.
Once upon a time, there was a boy and girl who loved each other. Then a slut came and ruined everything. The end.
Every day you will meet a moron; if you haven't met one today, tomorrow you'll meet two.
No really officer, I'm not as think as you drunk I am.
Hello substitute teacher... Goodbye assigned seats.
I am not afraid of death, it's just that I prefer not to be there when it happens.
S_CCESS can't be complete without U.
I don't watch any reality TV because I seriously can't afford to hate society any more than I already do.
The awkward moment when you're about to hug somebody sexy and then headbutt the mirror....
The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.
You never know how precious it is until you lose it. And you never know how annoying it is until you have it.
Definition of disappointment: guy runs into a wall with a boner and breaks his nose first...
I miss you like an idiot misses the point.
