Cool story bro. Publish it and sell it to someone who gives a shit.
I'm not an alchoholic, I'm a drunk. Alchoholics go to meetings.
When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.
Every day you will meet a moron; if you haven't met one today, tomorrow you'll meet two.
I'm not prejudiced, I hate everybody equally.
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
The world is full of guys, be a man.
It's not how much you love someone that matters, it's how much you make them feel loved.
I don't fail, I succeed in finding what does not work.
Don't let the world change your smile, let your smile change the world.
Winners do what other people won't.
24 hours in a day 24 beers in a case coincidence? I think not.
Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go.
When I'm always in my room; parents complain. When I go out; parents complain.
I really need you to, put the camera down and step away from the mirror.
Sex burns 25.7 calories per minute, with that being said, wanna work out?
Life is a bitch, but totally do-able.
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Life is like a penis. It's short, but seems so long when it gets hard
