Cool story bro. Publish it and sell it to someone who gives a shit.
An apple a day may keep the doctor away - but all these Macbooks are getting expensive.
It's hard to answer "what's wrong", when nothing is right...
If they dont chase you when you walk away....keep walking.
Chuck Norris puts the "fun" in "Funeral".
Haters are just confused admirers.
The toughest thing about success is that you've got to keep on being a success.
WORRY looks around. REGRET looks back. FAITH looks forward.
That awkward moment when your pet is staring at you naked...
Everyone's fine with babies being entertained by keys, but let one baby drive a Porsche and suddenly I'm a horrible uncle.
The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
Fear not the weapon, but the hand that wields it.
Practice makes perfect, but nobody's perfect, so why practice?
I love walking in the rain 'cause no one can see me crying.
I don't fail, I succeed in finding what does not work.
Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for a minute, but set him on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
There are needs and there are wants. I need what I want.
If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong.
When life blows sometimes the best thing you can be is a dick.
