Cool story bro. Publish it and sell it to someone who gives a shit.
My life without you would be like a broken pencil. Pointless.
I put the laughter in manslaughter.
If they dont chase you when you walk away....keep walking.
I don't know what's worse. Guys who refer to girls as b*tches, or the girls who actually respond to it.
Sometimes I look at people and think: That sperm actually won?
I eat problems, then shit out success.
Good things don't always have to come to an end.
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
.sdrawkcab siht daer uoy edam I
When life blows sometimes the best thing you can be is a dick.
Ran into my ex last week... backed up and ran over his ass again.
Don't judge a book by its movie.
You need over 60 muscles to look angry and less then 10 to smile, so why tire yourself?
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
You got enemies, good that means you stood up for something.
Science has made us gods even before we are worthy of being men.
Ironically, Chuck Norris' hidden talent is invisibility.
Growing old is mandatory. Growing up is optional.
