Some women can't find a GOOD MAN cause they're too busy looking for a PERFECT MAN.
I told my ex I felt like killing her, and she said I needed professional help, So I hired a hitman.
Cool story bro. Put it in the history books with all the other boring sh*t I don't care about.
Don't waste electricity, would you like it if I turned you on and walked away?
Short answers silent treatment not smiling = You did something wrong.
My life without you would be like a broken pencil. Pointless.
You know you're getting old when people start telling you how young you look.
.sdrawkcab siht daer uoy edam I
Everyone has photographic memory; some just don't have the film.
Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
You'll never know how strong you are, until being strong is the only choice you have.
I know I just met you last week but I kinda, sorta, just maybe, seriously have been curiously thinking about you every day since.
Boys will break your heart, Real men will pick up the pieces.
Hurting someone with the truth is better than killing them with a lie.
Finding the meaning to life gives life no meaning.
Fear not the weapon, but the hand that wields it.
Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband.
Definition of disappointment: guy runs into a wall with a boner and breaks his nose first...
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