Be kind and courteous to everyone you meet but have a plan to kill them quickly if necessary.
Disappointments are just God's way of saying: "I've got something better." Be patient, live life, have faith.
Consciousness: that annoying time between naps.
I miss you like an idiot misses the point.
It's nice to be important, but it's more important to be nice.
When your best friend comes to you with a bitch problem and you're like"I don't give a fuck."
Cool story bro. Wanna hear mine? It's a fairy tale; once upon a time, I don't give a shit. The end.
KEEP YOUR HEAD HIGH, and you're middle finger HIGHER.
Kiss me if I'm wrong, but is your name Susan?
God must love stupid people. He made SO many.
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
True friends aren't bought, they are earned.
The world is full of guys, be a man.
Teacher: "You failed the test." - Student:"You failed to educate."
Some people just need a high-five. To the face. With a chair.
Each morning when we wake up, we have two choices: go back to sleep and keep dreaming, or wake up and chase those dreams.
A rumor goes in one ear, then out of many mouths.
Born to be different, like everyone else.