Hurting someone with the truth is better than killing them with a lie.
Boyfriends are like goal keepers. Just because they are there doesn't mean you can't score.
You never how much is enough until you know how much is too much.
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
I wish I was as much of a morning person as my penis is.
I hate people who are lazy. They're so lazy, they don't even finish their own
That awkward moment when your in class then your stomach decides to make this dying whale's voice.
I swear Mario is a hobo! he wakes up wearing the same clothes, runs in sewers, and steals coins. To buy what. MUSHROOMS?
Cool story bro. Wanna hear mine? It's a fairy tale; once upon a time, I don't give a shit. The end.
If Bill Gates had a penny for every time I had to reboot my computer...oh wait, he does.
You can be worthless to someone, but priceless to another.
I can only endure saying goodbye because saying hello again will be all the sweeter.
Cool story bro. Publish it and sell it to someone who gives a shit.
Ironically, Chuck Norris' hidden talent is invisibility.
Short answers silent treatment not smiling = You did something wrong.
It's better to be the owner of your silence than the slave of your words.
It's not how much you love someone that matters, it's how much you make them feel loved.
Live everyday like it's your last because someday you will be right.