Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 52 people. Then the grenade exploded.
Cool story bro. Wanna hear mine? It's a fairy tale; once upon a time, I don't give a shit. The end.
If you love something, let it go. If it doesn't come back to visit, hunt it down and kill it.
That awkward moment when you walk through the metal detectors at the airport, and your abs of steel set them off.
Sneaking your seatbelt on slowly when you see a cop.
S_CCESS can't be complete without U.
Gravity is not the reason why people fall in love.
The awkward moment when you're eavesdropping on a strangers conversation and accidentally laugh out loud at a funny part.
Compromising is the same as losing, it just sucks more because winning was never in the deal.
Cool story bro. You should get it in Oprah's book club.
A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don't need it.
Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.
Smart girls open their mind, easy girls open their legs, and foolish girls open their heart.
When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.
I don't hate school. I just hate the teachers, the homework, the exams and waking up early in the morning.
Some people just need a high-five. To the face. With a chair.
I want a person who comes into my life by accident, but stays on purpose.
You can't buy love....but you pay heavily for it.
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