What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Except marriage, marriage will kill you.
Your character is more accurately determined by what you say about others behind their backs.
Take my advice, don't listen to my advice.
I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked me in the cellar.
NO MUM. You're mad because you're wrong not because I was talking back.
When life blows sometimes the best thing you can be is a dick.
You can pay for school, but you can't buy class.
Whatever doesn't kill you, makes you weaker and weaker until it eventually kills you.
Boyfriends are like goal keepers. Just because they are there doesn't mean you can't score.
I will still love you when you're no longer young and beautiful.
The awkward moment when someone is yelling at you and you're desperately trying not to laugh at their angry face.
WORRY looks around. REGRET looks back. FAITH looks forward.
Smart girls open their mind, easy girls open their legs, and foolish girls open their heart.
No one said it would be easy but I'm saying it's going to be worth it.
Say what you mean and mean what you say because the people that matter don't mind and the people that mind don't matter.
Some people should be high-fived...in the face.
A relationship with NO TRUST is like a car with no gasoline. You can stay in it all you want but it won't go anywhere.
It's weird not to be weird.
