I don't watch any reality TV because I seriously can't afford to hate society any more than I already do.
24 hours in a day 24 beers in a case coincidence? I think not.
The awkward moment when someone is yelling at you and you're desperately trying not to laugh at their angry face.
In my dreams you're mine, in my life you're a dream.
Growing old is mandatory. Growing up is optional.
Last night I dreamt I was eating a giant marshmallow...when I woke up my pillow was gone.
I'm tired of girls complaining that theres no good guys left...hello..we are where you left us, IN THE FRIEND ZONE.
Your character is more accurately determined by what you say about others behind their backs.
Surprise sex is the best thing to wake up to, unless you're in prison.
Sex burns 25.7 calories per minute, with that being said, wanna work out?
You can hold on to a person but not a relationship.
Don't like me? Take a seat with the rest of the bitches waiting for me to give a fuck
