The word 'studying' was made up of two words originally - 'students dying'.
Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes... That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.
You're never too old to learn something stupid.
If being sexy were against the law you'd be guilty as charged.
Cool story bro, now go make me a sandwich.
That awkward moment when it's not okay after an apology.
Sitting in the cinema, ready to watch the movie, then BOOM! The human giraffe sits in front of you.
If we were on a sinking ship together and there was only one life jacket...I'd miss u heaps and think of you often.
Cool story bro, tell it again and I'll punch you.
I should've known it wasn't going to work out between my ex-wife and me. After all, I'm a Libra and she's a bitch.
Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.
Why do Americans choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America?
Negativity is poison for the soul.
I am not afraid of death, it's just that I prefer not to be there when it happens.
You know you love her when people think you're crazy.
Cool story bro. The best part is when you stopped talking.
The world needs less people that judge and more people that love.
Ran into my ex last week... backed up and ran over his ass again.
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