Knowledge is power, and power corrupts. So study hard and be evil.
Depression is not a sign of weakness. It is a sign of being too strong for too long.
A pretty girl is nothing with an ugly attitude.
Cool story bro, changed my life.
My grandma is 80 and she still doesn't need glasses... she drinks straight out of the bottle.
When your best friend comes to you with a bitch problem and you're like"I don't give a fuck."
If a quiz is quizzical, what's a test?
Some people just need a high-five. To the face. With a chair.
If you can't convince them, confuse them.
I miss you like an idiot misses the point.
If we were on a sinking ship together and there was only one life jacket...I'd miss u heaps and think of you often.
A real man gives up one night stands for a woman he can't stand one night without.
Facebook is for for friends who are now strangers, Twitter is for strangers who should be your friends.
I'm not a nerd, I'm just smarter then you.
You should never ruin an apology with an excuse.
The awkward moment when someones yelling at you and your desperately trying not to laugh at their angry face.
I bet Osama Bin Laden regrets coming out of hiding to watch the Royal Wedding.
Unicorns are awesome. I am awesome. Therefore, I am a unicorn.
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