You know it's going to be a great story when its starts off with, "So this b*tch!..."
You inspire me to be a better pervert.
Fight poverty. Throw stones at beggers.
Last night I dreamt I was eating a giant marshmallow...when I woke up my pillow was gone.
I'm tired of girls complaining that theres no good guys left...hello..we are where you left us, IN THE FRIEND ZONE.
There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
Chuck Norris once strangled someone with a cordless phone.
Maybe you should eat some makeup so you can be pretty on the inside too, bitch.
You need over 60 muscles to look angry and less then 10 to smile, so why tire yourself?
Compromising is the same as losing, it just sucks more because winning was never in the deal.
Life sucks. But what it sucks on we may never know.
Love always costs more than you can afford, but its always worth the price.
You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.
You never know how precious it is until you lose it. And you never know how annoying it is until you have it.
If we were on a sinking ship together and there was only one life jacket...I'd miss u heaps and think of you often.
New anti depressant for lesbians... Trycoxagain
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
You live and you learn.
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