The awkward moment when a guy has bigger boobs than you.
The awkward moment when someones yelling at you and your desperately trying not to laugh at their angry face.
The awkward moment when you're about to hug somebody sexy and then headbutt the mirror....
Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
Last night I dreamt I was eating a giant marshmallow...when I woke up my pillow was gone.
Jingle bells, Twilight smells, Edward ran away, Bella died, Jacob cried, POTTER ALL THE WAY!!
The notion that you feel my pain is extremely uncertain. You have to apply the experience and pain of my life in order to come to this road.
You can't shake hands with a clenched fist.
The word 'studying' was made up of two words originally - 'students dying'.
Its much easier to apologize then it is to get permission.
When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.
Kim Jong Il's last words. "Hey, you're Chuck Nor....."
Would you like a table? ... "No, I came to the restaurant to eat on the ground, a carpet for 5 please." -_-
It isn't till you've lost everything that you are free to do anything.
We just have to accept the fact that some people are going to stay in our hearts....even if they don't stay in our lives.
My foot just fell asleep. I think I'm gonna kick it with your face to wake it up.
The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list.
Don't fall in love, fall off a bridge, trust me, it hurts less.
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